Having tablet metadata with more than 1 pending replica will prevent this metadata from being (re)loaded due to sanity check on load. This patch fails the operation which tries to save the wrong metadata with a similar sanity check. For that, changes submitted to raft are validated, and if it's topology_change that affects system.tablets, the new "replicas" and "new_replicas" values are checked similarly to how they will be on (re)load.
fixes#20043
(cherry picked from commit f09fe4f351)
(cherry picked from commit e5bf376cbc)
(cherry picked from commit 1863ccd900)
Refs #21020Closesscylladb/scylladb#21112
* github.com:scylladb/scylladb:
tablets: Validate system.tablets update
group0_client: Introduce change validation
group0_client: Add shared_token_metadata dependency
replica/tablets: Add to_tablet_metadata_(row_)?key helpers
replica/tablets: extract tablet_replica_set_from_cell()